You’ve seen them around campus; they live in the dorms, eat at Aramark and are usually making remarks about the weather. Odds are, some of you who are reading this are probably one of them: a Californian.
Why are Californians always made the butt of the joke in Oregon? Where is all the hype coming from? Let me explain why California produces, arguably, the most annoying of residents.
California is divided into three primary regions: Southern California, the Central Valley, and Northern California. As a whole, and compared to Oregonians, California residents are troublesome and live to stir up division within the United States. Plain and simple. Californians have brought with them to Oregon their carefree attitudes and overflowing amounts of confidence. A relocated Californian, Micah Hadley, comments on his boldness: “When we walk down the street, we look through people, not at them.” But there are many reasons to proceed with caution when building friendships with Californians.
Californians are notorious for having slang terminology that sets them apart from the rest of the United States. Calling highways or interstates, “the 99” or “the 5” is especially inconsiderate of those who prefer extra syllables. They see the cringe on your face as you correct them in your minds, and still, they don’t change.
The Dictionary of California is much like ordinary dictionaries, however, it contains an index for places abbreviated by Californians. Some of these include SoCal (Southern California), NorCal (Northern California), SLO (pronounced ‘slow,’ refers to San Luis Obispo), and San Fran (San Francisco), or the pronunciations of cities that are changed for the sake of a pun, like that of Fresno.
Oh, you mean Fres-yes?
But each region of California carries their own specific annoyances. For example, Northern California sits close enough to Oregon to take advantage of their tax free system, yet outside Oregon state lines for the luxury of pumping their own gas.
Those living in the Central Valley live happily within a two-hour radius of most Californian amusements: for example, the coast or the California state capitol; however, they have little to nothing to contribute other than the miles of field that surrounds Highway 99. Much of the historical qualities of California’s Central Valley are woven through the state’s ever present appreciation of the farmer’s tan.
Southern Californians may consider themselves the best at driving, most likely because they have had the most practice. Weaving in and through traffic lanes becomes an art form as soon as any California resident turns the key in the ignition. Californians drive with a destination in mind and a schedule to keep. That destination will most often be the open arms of an In-N-Out employee.
With an In-N-Out double-double in one hand and a vanilla milkshake in the other, Oregonians will never understand the romance between a Californian and his/her specially made extra crispy animal fries. Yes, there is an In-N-Out located in Medford, but ask any Californian and their claim will always be, “It’s just not the same.”
Californians have been roaming the Pacific Northwest for quite some time now and their travels and stays here in Oregon are nothing short of an epidemic, especially in recent years. It might be for the change in drought conditions or for the incredible coffee scene, but regardless of reason, Californians have moved and are here to stay.
Sincerely,
A Californian
Kelsey says
Morgan Beard, you are fantastic. Bravo. :)
Carol Kruse says
Having lived in SoCal for a while….I loved this article. But I have lived here in OR for nearly 27 years, and consider myself an Oregonian….
Darrin says
My annoyance with Californians goes back to where it originates. In fourth grade, we took our annual field trip to the capital where we all waited patiently in line to shake the hand of the man who started the anti-Californian sentiment. His name was Tom McCall. He became famous for his quippy admonishments to our southern neighbor.” Come visit us in Oregon, but PLEASE don’t move here”. A bumper sticker at the time read: “Tom McCall, the governor of Oregon cordially invites to visit California, Washington, Idaho, Nevada, or Afghanistan”.
In my 20’s, I went on a mission trip to the 1984 Olympic games and felt God moving as we walked down Hollywood boulevard handing out tracts and witnessing to tourists and locals. The drive down was uneventful but I was reminded of my feelings toward Californians as we made it over the grapevine and down into the Los Angeles basin. A little yellow VW bug convertible goes by, the blonde ponytail of the driver tossed about in the wind. The bumper sticker on the back of the bug read: “WELCOME TO CALIFORNIA, NOW GO HOME”
Californians.
While I saw the beginning of the anti-Californian culture, I can’t say that I was entirely on board with it. Some of the favorite people in my life came from there. My father was a realtor in Corvallis at the time and he sold a house to some very nice people from Anaheim. Their son and I met in 5th grade and we’ve been friends for the past 40 years. When my Aunt and Uncle retired from Redding California to Salem I was ecstatic. I visited them as often as I could, hoping my Uncle would tell me his stories with the 17th airborne in Germany during the end of WW2. I loved them both dearly and even though I moved out of state (Minnesota, not California) for 5 years in 2006, I called him a week before he passed away and asked him the most direct question I could.
“Uncle Ray, do you have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ?” I told him that I would be very disappointed it if I couldn’t continue our talks when I went to heaven. There seemed to be a bit of irony as Aunt Dorothy outlived Uncle Ray by 10 years, passing away on the 76th anniversary of the United States entry into the war her husband helped to win.
Even though I may be slightly smug about my home state and the minor irritation of so many folks moving from the Golden State to the Evergreen State, I cannot fault them. Some of the most beloved people in my life happen to be from California.