Are you really slowing down for a rabbit to cross the road? There’s a law that says you have to wear your seatbelt? Why can’t I just pump my own gas? These are things I think about every day.
You might not know this but there’s a place where something beautiful exists. A place where unicorns frolic, rainbows blanket the sky, and the sun shines every day. It’s unfamiliar territory, but I’ll go slow for you. There’s a place where something called freedom exists.
I know; your mind is blown.
While you liberal activists are saving rabbits from the harmful pollution of cars and coal mines, protecting the rights of a subspecies of owls, and generating new ways to add more laws and taxes, some of us are happily shooting things that would give any environmentalist a heart attack.
Most of Corban consists of students from Washington, California, and Oregon. In other words, we’re in the middle of some of the most liberal areas of the United States. The government should just put a barbed wire fence around the Pacific Coast, call it prison, and label it with a warning sign saying, “Do not trespass unless you are going to help the environment, increase debt, and make up ridiculous laws.”
Don’t get me wrong; I love Oregon. I love the beautiful coast, the atmosphere of Portland, the hippie town of Eugene, the all-year round green plants, and the fact that people actually live here. But sometimes I wonder, are all these laws necessary?
I grew up in Montana where the population of cows is higher than the population of the people. It’s a flyover state, I can admit that. Although it is 10 times more interesting than North Dakota. They literally have people who have been known to die from boredom.
We don’t have seatbelt laws or cell phone laws (although they’re bound to come eventually). There’s no sales tax, and the property tax is considered moderate. I got my driver’s license at 15. Any firearm manufactured in Montana that does not leave the state is exempt from all federal laws, including registration.
Like any state, it has its bad qualities. If you despise the outdoors, I suggest sticking to flying over Montana. And if your taste in weather excludes all forms of snow, don’t ever visit Montana from October to April. Also if you want only white friends, visit Montana.
But the thing I didn’t understand when I came to Oregon was why is there a need for so many laws?
Save your money (it’s hard to with the outrageous income tax), take a vacation, and experience that something called freedom. And when you return to your money-vacuum, liberal and outrageous laws, exercise your constitutional rights and vote against crazy laws!