Sale of All Sales!
Saturday Only Special Sale! (Preview Sale Friday)
Super Sale!
Everything 10% off! – including sales items (excluding shoes, purses, dresses, suits, scarves, hats, umbrellas, sox, linens, furniture and anything that starts with the letter Q)
$10 – spend it as you wish – at J.C. Penney’s (excludes perfume, Nike, and jewelry)
What is wrong with American women? Why do we shop at stores that insult our intelligence? Why are we so easily influenced to shop for bargains? Why are we drawn to those sale racks: 50% off, 70% off, Buy One Get One?
I have a proposal: We, American women who love to shop, could work a deal with the department stores. We will tell them to stop treating us like we’re ignorant. We will tell them to tag the item with the actual price – the price they intend to sell it for, not the ballooned price they never expected to sell it for.
Tell us that from now on you will advertise only the real price. Instead of telling us the item is marked down and hanging huge “SALE” signs, just charge us what the item is worth.
Would my proposal work? Sadly, no. It wouldn’t work. It wouldn’t work because our culture wouldn’t let it. We firmly believe in bargains. We firmly believe in getting the most for our money. We firmly believe in the whole sale mentality.
Offer us the actual price from day one, and we won’t bite. We will wait for the sale, because we have to believe we have outsmarted The Man. We want to brag to our friends: “I bought it for only $20, marked down from $60!” or “I saw it just last week at another store and almost bought it then. So glad I waited, because it went on sale, and I got it for half price!”
Even worse than the I-will-never-pay-the-regular-price is the I-don’t-need-it-but-it’s-on-sale mindset. My daughter-in-law once asked me if I had any clothes in my closet that still had the tags on them. I lied. I didn’t lie intentionally, but I lied nevertheless. I lied, because I said, “No.”
Then I looked. I had forgotten the turquoise top with the tag hanging on it; and how about those blouses I bought online because one of my favorite stores sent me the sale catalog. They are summery, so I can’t wear them yet, but I could have at least removed the tags. If I do that today, will that negate the lie?
At this time of life – eight years after I officially retired – I need to be getting rid of things, not buying more stuff. At least, that is my intention. And my pledge? I will stop buying things just because they are on sale.
But wait a minute. There’s that special dinner I’ll be attending at the Portland journalism convention. And I have “nothing” to wear. Maybe I’ll just shop for that one item – something dressy. After all, nothing in my closet will work.
Where will I go? Maybe Penney’s or Kohl’s or Macy’s? Christopher and Banks – yeah, that’s the place. I hear they’re having a sale…