Snapshots of the love doctor’s life
Meet Marty Trammell, Corban’s long-standing love doctor.
He has had the title for years. Trammell’s Valentine’s Day chapels are full of wisdom for young couples on campus, and he always makes himself available to help couples in need of direction or counseling. His relationship with his wife, Linda, is a well-known gift from God that he enjoys talking about in and out of class.
I sat down with Marty to ask him a little more about his love life, as any good reporter would.
The Proposal
Trammell wanted to propose on Christmas. Gold prices were through the roof that year, which meant he couldn’t get the ring he wanted to by then. He told Linda that she might expect something romantic, but he just couldn’t afford it.
Two days till Christmas, gold prices dropped through the floor. On Christmas Eve Trammell was on his way to Linda’s house, pulled over at the jewelry store on the way, found that he could afford the ring he had wanted to buy her, and bought it.
He had not asked Linda’s father yet, but still wanted to propose on Christmas day. The men talked that night while Linda was out with her sisters, and Trammell was relieved when Linda’s father said he was all for it.
There was a teen magazine quiz the young couple were going to fill out together for fun, “Are you dating the right guy,” and Trammell got the idea to change one of the questions to be “Will you marry me.”
That’s just what he did to question number ten.
They went for a walk, and it started snowing. Trammell described it as quaint and beautiful. They took the survey in the car together, and then he asked her the last question.
“If I had more time I would’ve planned more, but that’s how it worked out,” Trammell said, “and I’ve been glad she said yes every day since.”
The Trammell’s Relationship Before Marriage
Linda had broken up with Trammell before they were married. They were dating when they went on a thirteen-month music tour, and she broke up with him because she had just gotten out of a relationship and was afraid she was rebounding.
There they all were, singing songs of joy to the Lord, and Trammell could barely keep a smile on his face.
“I would read depressing theology books while the others were out having fun,” Trammell said. “I was just so sad about Linda.”
Eventually the road manager and his wife, who had wanted Marty and Linda to be a couple all along, asked Trammell about the breakup.
“They said Linda probably just wanted a day or so to think about things,” Trammell said, “but that she still probably liked me.”
Armed with this new knowledge of the mysterious ways in which women work, Trammell went to get Linda back.
He found Linda seated at a picnic table and planned on telling her, “Even if it takes the rest of my life, I’m going to convince you that I love you.” What he said was, “Even if it takes the rest of my life, I’m going to convince you that you love me.”
“It was a small life lesson,” Trammell said, “You don’t have to be perfect to make a relationship work.”
Advice for young couples
Trammell is brimming with words of wisdom for students in relationships. Here are a few nuggets of advice on dates, proposals, and making things work:
Plan things in advance so the other person feels appreciated and loved. This includes anything from making sure that person is free (calling his/her friends, manager or supervisors to ask for that time off), getting tickets, making a reservation or anything else appropriate for that person.
Make sure that whatever you do is something that person wants, not what you want to do for them. This is true for surprises, gifts, dates, and even your proposal.
Everybody is different. For instance, not every girl likes the sappy stuff, so find ways that make her feel really appreciated that are truly unique to her.
The ones who pretend to be perfect are the ones who never get loved. They don’t let anybody love the real them, because they never feel safe exposing their shortcomings. Perfection makes people feel uncomfortable in a relationship, and true perfection can never be reached, so be honest about your flaws.
“Being in love should be romantic at any time,” Trammell said in conclusion. “Relationships are a way for God to love someone through you, and bring others closer to Him.”